I think if I were to sum up what I learned on my mission is that people can change. Their very nature. I've changed. I'm still dorky Charlee Durfee but I know the past Charlee Durfee would look at where I am now and wish and want it. Its happened and its never going to stop. HOWEVER, we can't change by ourselves. The reason we can change (aka repent and be forgiven) is only through our Savior Jesus Christ. Sometimes I feel like I don't deserve it. I've seen others feel the same way too. I know there are those who still feel this way. But that is just a bunch of nonsense. No matter what we may have done or who we might have been in the past, it can be washed clean and forgotten because the suffering of our Redeemer. Not only have I seen it myself but in all of those I've taught here on the mission.
It doesn't end there, the change isn't immediate. Its always going to require work. But He's not going to leave us alone. I can tell all of you, that this wonderful gospel, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is the only true church on this earth that has the proper authority to baptize, perform miracles, give blessings, and perform those sacred ordinances like sealing families for eternity. That through this power and the gospel in its fullness we can unlock that changing power.
I seriously cant wait for making more mistakes (because its going to happen, I know, I'm not perfect, weird right?) to continue to progress, to grow, to be happy, to cry, to be scared, to be strong... Its going to be a wonderful ride, a crazy one, but a wonderful one none the less. And of course it isn't going to be easy. Life is hard, we all know this. We all have loads to carry, but we don't have to do it alone. My favorite scripture is Mosiah 24: 14-16.
"14. And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions.
15 And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease,and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord.
16 And it came to pass that so great was their faith and their patience that the voice of the Lord came unto them again, saying:Be of good comfort, for on the morrow I will deliver you out of bondage."
To have the burdens on our shoulders eased, we must do what Alma and his brethren did, that is submit cheerfully and with patience to ALL the will of the Lord. He knows better then I do, then we ALL do. I learned that last night while having dinner with my wonderful cousin Lindsey. I want to do a lot of things and I was getting overwhelmed. I had the feeling to tell her what had been on my mind and she said what I needed to hear even though I didn't want to hear it. Since I read that scripture I liked to think that I was putting the Lord's will over mine but I guess I had forgotten for a little bit.
Its definitely a humbling experience, warning: some pride might have to be swallowed. Its worth it! The change and the blessings afterwards, maybe not right after but they do come, are incredible! I love you all thanks for what you have done for me, supporting me, encouraging me, making me laugh, being there if I needed you.
I do have one more time to e-mail but I thought I would make this one the last big one. This is my testimony that I say in the name of Jesus Christ Amen.
Hermana Charlene Durfee
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